Tuesday 9 June 2015



norman has turned up early for your dinner party.

bernadette from accounts has invited him and she says he's really nice and he helps out at the orphanage on wednesdays, but you don't really know him very well and there's something about the way he looks at you which makes you feel uncomfortable - plus he smells of death and untold horror. do you let him in? 
what you gonna do?


IDEAS SESSION AT THE DILDO FACTORY


BOSS: ok people - rabbits and dolphins on dildos have been done to death. we need new ideas. we need new sexy animals. anyone?

WORKER: how about a chicken?

BOSS: think sexier

WORKER: sexier than a chicken?

BOSS: yes

WORKER: chickens are sexy

BOSS: no

WORKER: what about a chicken in a dress

BOSS: no! no chickens

WORKER: sperm whale?

BOSS: too sexy. think smaller

WORKER: ants? spiders?

BOSS: ...

WORKER: chicks dig spiders, right?

BOSS: ... you're fired, gary.


Friday 5 June 2015


some observations i've made about your facebook page